


lost in japan

by naeildo



Series: 300 word balloons [2]
Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Soulmates AU, Superpowers AU, non-linear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-28
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2020-02-09 05:55:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18632176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/naeildo/pseuds/naeildo
Summary: "Nice to meet you," Nayeon says, gently, like she's talking to a startled kitten. She casts a glance at the name sticker on Mina's binder. "Mina-san?" There's a twinkle in her eye that's punctuated by Sana's obnoxious laughter at the bad joke and the others' quiet tittering, already falling into their own conversations. Mina is just - Mina is just staring at Nayeon, willing herself to speak. It feels like Nayeon will take the air in Mina's lungs away when she leaves.





	1. Chapter 1

Sometimes Mina can hear her before she appears, the brief rustling of the shower curtains when she ends up in the shower, her elbow knocking Mina's dinner off the table. Other times Nayeon comes without a sound, drops in next to Mina on the bed. All that signals her arrival is the dipping of the mattress and Mina's own heartbeat speeding into overdrive.   
  
Nayeon's still stirring from what must have been a bad dream, and her features are unguarded and a little crumpled from all the years of - whatever this is. Mina reaches out to cup Nayeon's cheek, wishes she could smooth the fatigue away from her face, and the older girl's eyes flutter open slowly, focusing on Mina's face.  
  
"Good evening," Mina says. Tries not to start the countdown in her head. Wishes she could focus on the moment and Nayeon here, warm and real beneath her fingers.  
  
Nayeon brings her left hand up to rub at her eyes, and the motion is vigorous until it stills, suddenly. The way she looks at Mina - eyes suddenly wide with realization, tender and desperate all at once - is, Mina finds, devastating. The feeling travels down Mina's arms and to the tips of her fingertips like fireworks, burning at the corners of Mina's eyes. Nayeon is fine. Nayeon is with her. Nayeon is here.   
  
  
\  
  
  
_"Hey, Minari,_ your  _Im Nayeon is over_ there _," Sana has her hands on Mina's shoulders, steering them through the crowd that's already started to gather even as Mina makes her best efforts to scuttle away. Mina's crush on Nayeon isn't public knowledge - only Sana and Momo even have a clue about it, but at the rate Sana's going soon the whole school will be apprised of it._  
  
_Mina doesn't know how to tell them that she's dreamed of this exchange student since she was ten, that they've aged together over the years. That Mina had seen Nayeon across campus and promptly burst into a fit of tears that she later blamed on a failed test. There was no failed test._  
  
_Sana's pulled Mina all the way to where Nayeon is, seated at a table with the group of friends she's gathered around herself. Nayeon looks up, and there's a beat of confusion before her gaze settles on Mina's face - Mina who's straining at Sana's iron grip on her arm - and something in Nayeon's gaze shifts. Is it - could it be recognition? It's absolutely batshit crazy, but Mina wishes it was._  
  
_"Jeongyeon!" Sana says brightly, oblivious to the way Mina is getting more lightheaded by the minute. She's still bad with the "g" sound, but Jeongyeon seems more than happy to induct Sana into their fold, moving in along with the other exchange students to make space for them. They were in the same anthropology class or something, as far as Mina had been paying attention to Sana's gushing._  
  
_"Nice to meet you," Mina says. Her voice comes out small, unsteady. Mina already has enough trouble introducing herself to people in general, despite Sana's best efforts, but then Nayeon has a hand on her arm, gently prompting her to sit down, and Mina's head goes entirely blank. There's a smile on her face that's so wide - one Mina's only seen in her dreams._  
  
_"Nice to meet you," Nayeon says, gently, like she's talking to a startled kitten. She casts a glance at the name sticker on Mina's binder. "Mina-san?" There's a twinkle in her eye that's punctuated by Sana's obnoxious laughter at the bad joke and the others' quiet tittering, already falling into their own conversations. Mina is just - Mina is just staring at Nayeon, willing herself to speak. It feels like Nayeon will take the air in Mina's lungs away when she leaves._  
  
  
\  
  
  
The first time, Mina found Nayeon in an alleyway on the way back from her part-time job. Nayeon had been bleeding from her right arm, and Mina had felt her brain shut down slowly, like time was stopping altogether until Nayeon called her name, smile crooked, like she was trying to assure Mina even while bleeding out to certain death.  _Hey, Mina-san. Going home?_  Up to that point, they had only been with each other in group settings, Mina too shy to ask for alone time and Nayeon too respectful of her space to demand it. Now Nayeon was bleeding all over Mina's garbage stack.   
  
"Oh my God," Mina said, hauling Nayeon up onto her small back. She could only fit half of Nayeon on, hanging off her for her dear life with her good arm. Mina had to call  _someone_  for help. Sana would still be awake, she was sure. Nayeon looked just about ready to pass out. "Nayeon, what happened?"  
  
Up close, Mina could trace the gash running down Nayeon's forearm, wide and ugly. It looked like something inflicted by an instrument far wider than a knife. Nayeon had tried to stem it with a bit of her jacket, but it'd fallen off while Mina had jostled her up.  
  
"I'm going to call an ambulance for you, okay?"  
  
"Don't," Nayeon pressed her palm to Mina's lit-up phone screen. "Sorry for the blood," she laughed, when she removed her hand and a trail of red spots gathered on the top right hand corner of the screen. Mina wanted so badly to cry.  
  
"Nayeon, you're bleeding all over my clothes," Mina said, trying to tamp down the unfathomable, terrifying feeling of loss in her chest.   
  
"Just call Jeongyeon for me," Nayeon passed Mina her phone. It was all in Korean, which was really not helping the panic attack that was about to settle upon Mina. Was she hyperventilating? She was probably hyperventilating. "Here," Nayeon said, palming through her contacts. "Just tell her where we are."  
  
Nayeon's voice was soft and thin, a world away from the boisterous one she carried around with her on-campus.   
  
Jeongyeon picked up on the first ring. Her voice was harsh. "Give me the address."  
  
"Umm," Mina said. She was inching Nayeon forward to her house. She was blubbering. "Jeongyeon, I really can't do this. I don't think I can do this."  
  
Mina stilled when Nayeon's hand drifted across her jaw, landing on her collarbone. It was a light touch, nothing more, but Mina felt the breath return to her lungs. "Minari, please stay with me," Nayeon's voice urged, small and steady. "Breathe."  
  
  
\  
  
  
_Mina's pacing around her living room like an idiot, because Nayeon's still hasn't returned to her dorm, because the takeout gyozas she got for the two of them are getting cold, because Nayeon isn't back, like she promised._  
  
_So Mina's right, to get angry. When Nayeon comes walking through the door at eleven thirty like she isn't two hours late, like Mina hasn't felt like she was on the verge of a panic attack the whole time, and Mina's right to throw Nayeon's hands off and right to storm into their room and lock the door behind her, and_ no _, she isn't opening the door, and Nayeon is_ not _allowed to teleport in here._  
  
  
  
_Mina finds Nayeon crouched against the wall next to the door when she finally pushes it open hours later, head tucked into the arms she has folded in front of her. Nayeon looks so small like this that Mina thinks she shouldn't have had the ability to traipse across the universe given to her - they should have given it to someone else, bigger and stronger and loved by someone else who isn't Mina. Nayeon starts instantly at Mina's footsteps, her head shooting up. Her eyes are still bleary._  
  
_"Mina-san," Nayeon tries, her hand already inching up to land on Mina's wrist. Her voice is rough from sleep, and Mina drops down beside her, back against the wall, shoulder to shoulder._  
  
_"You could just stop," Mina says. Nayeon is looking at her, and Mina knows she's forcing herself not to interrupt. To defend herself. "I asked you to stop. You don't know what it's like waiting for you."_  
  
_If Mina is being selfish, so be it. Nayeon is her_ soulmate _. She has the right to be selfish about this._  
  
_Nayeon lets the silence hang between them for a while, and it stretches over Mina like an unbearable weight._  
  
_"You know I can't do that," Nayeon says. It's so small, so very small, gentle and tender in the way that Nayeon only is with Mina, like she's something to break._  
  
_It's not an ultimatum - not one that Mina has ever verbalized, but Nayeon has made a choice. She will always make the choice. Mina thinks she's known for a while now. Mina isn't one to hold on to things. Nayeon can be comparmentalized away into a failed relationship. A thing of her dreams. Right now, in this small apartment, Mina starts to cry._  
  
  
\  
  
  
Nayeon really hadn't meant to appear where Mina was. She'd already returned to Korea for months, and Mina was sitting on her couch and watching the latest re-runs of the new drama Sana was obsessed with, and Nayeon had just - dropped in, making a ruckus in Mina's kitchen and taking the dish rack off its wall.  
  
Mina didn't scream. Nayeon had a small bruise that was blooming across her forehead, and she was in her pajamas, decorated with light blue cartoon elephants. Cradling her arm. Everything - her faded eyebrows, the cascade of her hair across her shoulders, the smell of heavy perfume, freshly-scrubbed skin. Nayeon brought it all with her, standing in the midst of broken porcelein strewn across Mina's kitchen floor.  
  
"Mina-san?" Nayeon said. Her eyes were pulled wide even with sleep weighing heavy on them, and Mina felt something inside her break like a dam, the uncontrollable motion of bringing Nayeon close, skin to skin, her hand pressed to the curve of Nayeon's nape, Nayeon's morning breath on her mouth.  
  
A little sliver of rebellion until the morning came.  
  
  
\  
  
  
_Nayeon brings Mina out dancing, after Nayeon's accommodated multiple sessions of eating and lazing around in Mina's apartment, a TV show they weren't focusing on playing in the background. Mina spends their time at the club between laughing and blushing, Nayeon egging her on to take the dance floor, and she follows Nayeon there like there's an invisible string pulling her forward. Maybe there is._  
  
_"Mina-san," Nayeon says, her hands on Mina's waist. She's still careful in the middle of all this, and Mina nudges her nose gently against Nayeon's shoulder, hoping Nayeon gets what she's trying to communicate. Wordlessly, Nayeon draws her hands together behind Mina's waist, pulling her closer._  
  
_"Nayeon-ssi," Mina answers playfully. Nayeon brings this out of her - a kind of willful childishness wrapped up in light. Nayeon laughs in that way that only Nayeon can, loud and with abandon, like she's taking all the clouds over Mina's head with her._  
  
_"I've found my dream girl," Nayeon laughs. Her eyes are so bright. Mina can still make it out under the flashing lights and currents of EDM pulsing around them, and she smiles into Nayeon's shoulder. They'd talked about this somewhere on the third time Nayeon had crashed Mina's apartment, between Nayeon burning cheese toast to crisp and Mina's futile attempt at rebooting her old DVD player. Nayeon had come out with it - the girl of her dreams. The same face she saw that day, when Sana had come bustling over._  
  
_Mina hums. There's a rhythm to them that's out of step with the rest of the crowd, an enclave they've pulled around themselves._  
  
Yes _, Mina breathes._ The girl of my dreams _._  
  
  
\  
  
  
Mina is content to love Nayeon in parts. From far away, when Nayeon is on TV, kicking someone's face in. Mina watches until the tapes capture her running away into a dark place, knows that this is all the assurance she needs to turn off the screen. The letters Nayeon sends once in a while, written on paper and printed with a written address (note:  _only if you want to write back. i miss you still. i'm well and alive._ ). Nayeon is considerate with Mina, in between the brashness that takes up the other parts of her life.  
  
And then from up close, here, in the little hours Nayeon has between sleeping and dreaming. Nayeon twines their fingers together, the look in her eyes disbelieving. Her thumb is drawing small circles on Mina's hand.  
  
"Are you real?"   
  
Mina shouldn't be lying. She knows Nayeon's dreams have brought her here, her heart tethered to Mina, following that strand when she's unconscious.  
  
"I could be," Mina decides. Nayeon's smile is so open, and warm, and bright.   
  
For these few hours, before Nayeon returns home and forgets, Mina can have her. Her dream girl. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> addendum

The view from up here is different. 

“I think I deserve a reward,” Nayeon says, and Mina watches the smirk bloom on her face. Mina’s own face goes hot, and she’s suddenly glad for the dim make-up of this place. She’s been playing with Mina’s hands for the first half and being an all-around distraction, nosing against Mina’s neck at the most inappropriate parts of the performance and stifling laughs against her shoulder.

“You can have it after the show,” Mina says, a little too carelessly, peering down at the set-up work that they’re doing for the next half until she stiffens when she feels Nayeon’s arms wrap around her waist. 

“I even bought tickets for us because I know you wanted to support the _art_ ,” she’s whining now, and Mina fights the urge to laugh. She shouldn’t be indulging her.

“You nearly sent us into the chandelier the first time you tried phasing us in,” Mina retorts. “Maybe we should have gone with the tickets next time.” Mina doesn’t mean that, not really - she likes the heavy gaze from Nayeon she can feel when she’s paying attention to the dancers on stage, the way Nayeon can’t seem to keep her hands off her. The privacy they have here, hidden away from the rest of the world. Nayeon makes her entertain all sorts of silly things.

Mina cocks her head. “How did you know? That I wanted to watch this?” Nayeon had barged in with two tickets in the morning and told Mina to wear pants for their date tonight. Nice ones, of course. Saving the world could wait for another day. _For after I’ve won the heart of my beautiful date_! Nayeon had announced into their living room, and Mina pulled her in and knocked her lightly on the head, a fondness bubbling up in her chest so strong that she could hardly bear it.

“Checked your phone history,” Nayeon says, and laughs when Mina bristles. It’s soft, tinkling, unlike the kinds that Nayeon lets out in public. “I’m just kidding.” Reaches for Mina’s hands. “I wouldn't.”

“I do listen when you ramble sometimes, you know,” Nayeon says, and Mina feels something in her chest warm, “even if it looks like I’m just admiring myself in the mirror.”

“You’re the worst,” Mina mutters, a half-smile in her voice, even if her body says otherwise: lifts her fingers to skate across Nayeon’s cheeks, feeling them warm under her hold. Presses a kiss to the crown of Nayeon’s head. People below them are returning to their seats. “Thank you.”

-

When they get back, Nayeon takes Mina’s coat and hangs it up carefully on the rack. Mina watches the veins that stand out in her arms, follows the gentle motion as Nayeon starts talking.

“I wish I could bring you all the way to Russia,” she’s saying, and Mina can’t help the laugh that comes out of her, settling onto the arm of the couch. “Just - hold my breath long enough to cross that ocean. That’s where the Nutcrackers are, right?” Mina laughs, because it’s funny - 

“You wouldn't make it,” she says, without thinking, the laugh dying in her throat.

“And how wonderful it would be,” Nayeon sing-songs, leaning down to pick her own coat up from the floor, hanging it up haphazardly, “dying in the arms of the girl I lo-”

“You’d die,” Mina says, softer, and the sob that she’s trying to fight makes Nayeon turn around. The older girl’s face crumples, and she pads forward to where Mina is, arms held out to catch her as she lists forward.

“Hey,” Nayeon says. Her voice is soft. Apologetic. Her hands gentle against Mina’s shoulders. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

Mina is ruining their date night. Mina is ruining their date night, when Nayeon finally, _finally_ doesn’t have to run out the door, because she can’t, for one second -

“Mina-san,” Nayeon says, softly, thumbing at Mina's cheeks. Her voice trembles. Nayeon doesn’t cry in front of her often. Locks herself in the bathroom sometimes, if she needs to. Steps out if she says she wants some air. “I won’t, okay? I won’t put myself in danger, I promise.”

_But how can you promise that?_  Mina thinks. Grips at the fabric of Nayeon’s sweater, rolled up to her elbows. Nayeon is crying. Softly, slowly, quietly, face tilted towards the ground. _That you won’t leave me?_


	3. Chapter 3

Their first time ends up not being their first time after all. 

First, Nayeon bumps her elbow against the rack above Mina’s bed while she’s trying to get her shirt off, then Mina’s jeans set a burst of static running down her comforter that run down Nayeon’s arm, which makes Nayeon shiver and accidentally jostle Mina’s head into the headboard. Mina’s bed isn’t that large, and Nayeon’s ankles are already hanging off it awkwardly, with little purchase against the wall that’s a bit too far out of her reach.

“Shit,” Mina says, softly, and Nayeon lets out a disbelieving laugh. Her eyes are soft under the glow of Mina’s night lamp, and Nayeon crumples onto Mina, blanketing her with her body, shirt riding halfway up her belly, warm against Mina’s hand. Nayeon reaches up to palm at the crown of Mina’s head gently, thumb moving in aimless circles.

“Sorry,” Nayeon says, and Mina can almost feel the heat radiating from Nayeon’s cheeks.

“I thought you said you knew what you were doing,” Mina teases, laughing into Nayeon’s shoulder. They’re no strangers to intimacy, now, with the way Mina has ended up curled under Nayeon’s arm most of their movie nights, but this was still different. Made Mina’s heart catch in her throat when Nayeon blindly locked the door behind her, pressing Mina into the wooden frame, long fingers grappling at the belt loops of Mina’s jeans.

But whatever mood they’d worked up was broken now, and Nayeon is breathing soft and slow against Mina’s chest, the fatigue of the day coming over them. Nayeon had brought Mina ice skating in the outdoor rink, but they’d spent most of it waiting in the cold, Nayeon holding Mina’s hands in her own until they both turned cold and dry in the air. Then Nayeon had fallen at least five times on the ice, bringing Mina down with her, the two of them caught in the whirlwind of couples spinning circles around them.

“I _do_ ,” Nayeon says petulantly, breath puffing against Mina’s cheek. Her heater is still a little janky, makes her room blow hot and cold, and even Nayeon’s powers don’t extend to heating. Mina pulls the comforter over Nayeon’s shoulders, as much as she can, but it slides off as Nayeon props herself up on her elbows, now, so she’s hovering over Mina.

Mina traces the sinewy lines of Nayeon’s muscles that flex and wane with the tips of her fingers as Nayeon adjusts herself, hair hanging down in a curtain over her face. Mina brings her hands to run them along Nayeon’s forearms, which gets Nayeon to stop looking glum, at least, closing her eyes and relaxing above her. There’s still a frown on her face, though, and Mina can’t help the fond laugh she lets out.

“Somehow I feel like I’m the one that deserves to be upset,” Mina says, softly, with a tone that lets Nayeon know she doesn’t mean it, but Nayeon just shakes her head, looking down at Mina with dark eyes.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re really, really beautiful?” Nayeon says, and it’s so serious that Mina doesn’t quite know how to respond.

“I have been told that a few times,” Mina says, still. The smile in her voice is so sweet that it should surprise her, but it doesn’t anymore, not when she’s with Nayeon. “And then my girlfriend came to my side and told them to ‘fuck off’.” Nayeon smiles, then, too, and it’s the brilliant kind that Mina’s grown fond of eliciting from Nayeon, makes her chest glow and burn with something she can’t name. Nayeon dips her head down to nudge at Mina’s collarbone.

“Has anyone ever told you that you are _incredibly_ frustrating?” Nayeon says, and Mina slaps her lightly on the head, lets Nayeon relax again, folding into her.

“Most people are too polite for that.”

“So you’re saying I’m rude.” Nayeon’s voice is muffled against Mina’s bare shoulder. She’s nosed the collar of Mina’s shirt aside, and Mina tries not to shiver.

“I’m saying that I love you despite that,” Mina says, carefully, reaching to cup Nayeon’s cheek in her hand, and Nayeon leans into the touch, letting out a long breath. It’s an awkward position, but Mina’s thumb traces over one of the cuts that’s only started to pattern over, extends from under Nayeon’s eye to her jaw, slicing straight across her cheek. Nayeon had gotten it from a tree branch that whipped across her cheek while she was trying to get a cat out of a tree, and Mina didn’t know how to be angry at her for that, so she’d only laughed, led Nayeon to the first aid box with both hands. Kissed her on the cheek, the used cotton wipes on the table forgotten as Nayeon nudged her over to the couch.

“How did you explain this one away?”

Nayeon’s had four full days of classes since then, all the way until the weekend fell and she could catch some sleep. Mina has found her sprawled over her notes more than once, cheek pressed into a page on visual marketing techniques.

“Told the truth,” Nayeon says, and she already sounds a little drowsy. “Tried to save a cat from a tree.”

Mina laughs. “And they believed you?”

“Just left out the part about falling from a dangerous height,” Nayeon murmurs, absentmindedly, and something curls in Mina’s gut.

“Be careful,” Mina says, softly, as sternly as she can, and Nayeon stills against her. She always fidgets, somehow, even when she’s tired. _Don’t hurt yourself,_ Mina means, but Nayeon reaches up again to rub at Mina’s head, eyelashes fluttering against Mina’s shoulder, and Mina knows Nayeon is thinking of someone else. 

“Always,” Nayeon says. Her left hand traces circles on Mina’s hipbone. “I’ll always be careful with you, Minari.”

  
  
  
  



End file.
